


What Could Have Been Love

by GrimLiFiendish



Series: Jason’s Realization [1]
Category: Pretty Little Liars, Pretty Little Liars Series - Sara Shepard
Genre: F/M, Jaria, PLL Fanfiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-04
Updated: 2017-12-04
Packaged: 2019-02-10 10:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12909825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrimLiFiendish/pseuds/GrimLiFiendish
Summary: Synopsis: Jason is on his way back to Rosewood after the girls bring Alison home. He hasn't been back since shortly after Ali's disappearances and a realization he had about his feelings for Aria. He comes home for his sister and to get the girl, but has he put it off for too long.Characters: Jason DiLaurentis, Aria Montgomery, Alison DiLaurentis, Spencer Hastings, Jessica DiLaurentisSong Inspiration: What Could Have Been Love by AerosmithPairings: Jason/Aria Ezra/Aria Jason/Melissa (mentioned) Jason/Cece (mentioned, she's not mentioned by name)





	What Could Have Been Love

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted Jessica to be alive, I missed her after her death. Also, Ezra did stalk the girls and date Aria for the book, but I am not sure if they know this yet or not in my story. Aria loves Jason, but was hurt when he ran off and Ezra did get shot helping them get Ali back so there is a sense of obligation, the ending needs work, but I wanted to get it up. Aria's Joey Ramona outfit is posted below

Jason had been gone for too long, and he hoped he hadn't left something for too late. He had run away after Alison's disappearance after a night spent in Aria's arms. He ran away more frightened than he ever had been in his life. Running away from what could have been the love of his life, staring him right in the face. He only hoped he hadn't left things too late because he wasn't going back to Rosewood just for Alison he was going back for Aria.

Two and a half years earlier  
He had been sitting on his steps feeling worthless, the police had come to question Jason and his parents again about the night of Alison's disappearance his parents were out of town for the night and he still could remember nothing. He had been so wasted that night and almost every other night he barely remembers anything about the past year.

The girl he had been dating broke up with him the morning after Alison's disappearance and while that made him upset, really, he didn't remember a whole lot about their relationship, it wasn't like it had been really serious, they had only kissed a few times. The thing he remembers the most was the color pink or more specifically pink hair. And he had been thinking about that pink hair when Aria Montgomery walked toward him that night as he sat there so lost wondering if he had hurt his own sister.

"Hey." she said shifting nervously, stuffing her hands in the back pockets of well-worn denim shorts as if not knowing what to do, "Um, I just wanted to check and see how you were doing?" she said a hand coming out of a back pocket to pushing a pink lock behind a dainty ear nervously, her face turning almost the same shade of pink as the lock of hair as she looked down at her tiny feet with black painted toenails encased in black flip flops. She picked an imaginary piece of lint from Joey Ramone emblazoned on her black t-shirt before nervously playing with her rings and black leather bracelet she was wearing.

Jason had never talked to Aria much or any of Alison's Power Puff friends, but she had always been his favorite, thinking she had more substance than the rest of the girls. She was the only one to come over and check on him since Ali's disappearance. 

He had started to tell her he was fine, but much to his embarrassment a huge sob escaped his throat and the next thing he knew Aria was standing between his legs bending to hug him tightly. At first, he stiffened up, this was the first comfort anyone had given him since Ali had disappeared. Honestly, it was the first time anyone had showed concern for him or offered him comfort in years.

Jason found himself pulling the young girl tightly to his body his head buried in her stomach as he sobbed for his missing sister, for the lost memories and for himself and his parents. Aria ran soothing hands through his hair not saying a word just being there for him.

They stayed like that for some time until the fury of Jason's emotions passed leaving him exhausted both emotionally and physically. He thought he would be embarrassed after the meltdown, but he wasn't. For some reason, he felt safe with her and looked up at her, green eyes still wet with tears. There was no pity in her eyes as she looked down at him; only a shared pain, empathy, concern and a look Jason couldn't quiet define, but it was it was a look of longing and need. His eyes were reflecting that same need and longing, he just didn't know it.

Aria stood in the circle of his arms looking down at him, her fingers combing through his hair in a soothing manner her expression gentle. She didn't say a word, she didn't have to, it was as though at this moment in time words were unnecessary between them. Aria lean down placing her lips on his in an intimate, but innocent caress. Jason's lips parted beneath her closed one and his tongue came out tracing the seam made by her closed lips seeking refuge inside and Aria parted her lips welcoming him. With a choked sigh, Jason's eyes closed, one hand moved to the back of her head his long fingers combing through the long silky tresses, guiding her closer to his questing lips.

He didn't care that anyone could see them, all he cared about at that moment was the girl in his arms and the comfort and strength he was pulling from her. He had notice Aria when he came home at the beginning of summer, before she had just been his sister's friend, they were all growing up, but unlike other Rosewood girls she always done the unexpected, like the dark pink streaks in her hair and showing compassion for him.

Jason tightened his arm around her waist pulling her body as close as he could to his own until she was kneeling on the step below the one he was sitting on, her body arched into his and her arms firmly locked around his neck her fingers threading though his hair, his kiss deepening and her response as natural as if they had kissed many times before today.

Jason finally pulled away from her looking into dark hazel eyes with his own searching green, long fingers of one hand gently traced the delicate lines of her face and kiss swollen lips before standing to his feet. Aria looked up at him a questioning look in her eyes, Jason bent down kissing her forehead. "Come on." Tugging on her hand indicating that she should follow him inside as the dusk of the evening settled around them.

Jason wasn't thinking of her age, or her lack of experience, he was only thinking that he needed her with him tonight. Maybe it was selfish on his part, but it had been so long since he felt like he mattered or that anyone cared. Aria had made him feel like that tonight and he didn't want to lose that feeling yet.

Aria followed after a small hesitation. Jason led her up the front steps and across the porch before pulling her inside the house. Aria started to turn toward the living room only for Jason to pull her toward the steps leading to the upstairs to his bedroom. he led her down the hall through the door at the very end. Aria looked around in surprise, she had never been in his bedroom before. It was nothing like she pictured it to be. Based on Alison's depiction of her brother she had expected it to be painted black, cluttered with beer bottles, porn magazines and dirty clothes covering every surface. but it wasn't like that at all, it was clean with very little clutter.

The walls were painted pale gray, the queen-sized bed had a tall wooden head board and the matching furniture in charcoal gray, the bed spread and curtains were also charcoal, accent pillow were pale gray, charcoal and teal striped with a cushion laying on the floor were teal as was the throw thrown haphazardly on the foot of the bed. There were black wrought iron lamps on lamps with teal and charcoal striped lampshades one bedside tables one of the had an alarm clock and stack of CD's that obviously belonged in built in shelves surrounding a stereo system complete with a record and cassette player there were shelves of CD's, vinyl records and even cassette tapes.

On one wall by a window was a computer desk above that was a built book case crammed full of well read books, the table was cluttered with a camera and equipment, a drawing pad and pencils. Aria walked over to look at the books on the shelf. There was several by Ray Bradbury that she loved, as well as some Hemingway, Lovecraft and Poe He had Lord of the Flies, Frankenstein, Dracula, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, some Sherlock Holmes and the Odyssey stuffed in among Stephen King, Dean Koontz and William Johnstone. Aria smiled when she saw a copy of Pride and Prejudice one of her favorites and she couldn't help the giggle that escaped when she noticed a well-read copy of Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss. For some reason his bookshelf seemed to give a lot of insight to the man whose room she was standing in.

On the wall were black and white photographs tastefully framed in weathered antique gray wood frames. She recognized places in a couple of the photos and knew they were taken by Jason. She had never realized how talented of a photographer he was. Hanging over his bed was a picture of a girl with dark hair blowing in the breeze hiding her face from view as she stood overlooking a body of water, beside it was two smaller pictures of the same girl, her face still hidden from view: in one her back was to the photographer, she was looking over her shoulder at someone and you could imagine her laughing and in the other one she was looking down at the ground one hand pushing hair behind her ear.

Aria wondered who the girl was and if the photographer had feeling for her. Aria had no clue she was the girl in the pictures, and that the photographer had feeling for her, but didn't realize it yet. They had been taken at the lake last summer. Jason had brought his camera and Alison had demanded Jason take pictures of her and the girls and wouldn't leave him alone until he agreed. He had taken the pictures of aria after Alison’s impromptu photo shoot. 

He was looking for interesting shots and come across Aria in a world of her own and he had been unable to resist to take the pictures of the unguarded moment she had never known her was there and she had never turned her face toward him which only added an element of mystery to the pictures. Once he developed them he had given all of them to Alison, except these, for some reason he had been compelled to keep them himself; only he knew who the girl was or that he was the photographer.'

Jason watched as Aria looked around his room with curiosity. He thought she had been in here snooping with Alison a few times, but now he was certain she had never been in his room until now. He walked up behind her and put his arms around her waist, resting his chin her shoulder as she looked through his music collection.

Aria was surprised to see music by members of the Rat Pack, Louis Armstrong, Johnny Cash, Etta James, Leonard Cohen and Elvis Presley. She also noticed he had blues, classic rock and even a few swing/big band albums, but most of his music was stuff she knew Jason listened to classic alternative, punk, post-punk, ska and metal since she would hear it coming from his room during sleepovers at Alison's over the years. Most of the time she preferred his music to what Alison and the girls listened to. P!nk was about the only music the girls listened to that Aria actually liked, usually they listened Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, Beyoncé and Katy Perry as well as a few others that weren't really Aria's taste. She was so sick of Party in the USA she could vomit every time it came on.

"You've always had better taste in music than the girls." She told him, "I strain my ears trying to hear your music over the crap Ali and the girls always want to listen to." she said with a small laugh that died in her throat when she remembered that Alison had disappeared and no one knew where she was at or if she was even alive. Aria bit her lip blinking back tears as she turned around facing Jason again. "I'm sorry." She looked up at him and she could see the worry on his face.

"You know, it's okay to say her name, Aria. I know you miss her." he said wanting to comfort the girl in his arms.

He had a sad smile on his face, his eyes looked tired and sunken in, underneath the bottomless green pools were dark shadows and bags. Aria pulled his head down and kissed under each eye and then pulled his head into her shoulder, they stood there like that until a few minutes later Jason lifted her tiny frame until she was eye level with him her arms tightened around his shoulders and her legs came up wrapping around his waist for added support.

Jason placed his lips against hers moving in a gentle caress the tip of his tongue barely touching her lips before they parted the tip of her tongue meeting his in a gentle caress, their lips moving together in a tender, but passionate kiss. Jason's hands moved under the t shirt caressing the silky skin beneath before laying her back against the soft material of his bedspread. He followed placing his elbows on the mattress to support some of his weight and continued to kiss her over and over her mouth widened for him and he deepened the kiss. it wasn't until Jason's hand moved under her shirt, his fingers moving beneath the smooth material of her bra cupping a bare breast that Aria showed any signs of hesitation when she stiffened and Aria moaned in protest, Jason thought about what he was doing and who he was doing it with. He immediately stopped pulling his hand from beneath her bra and top. She was fifteen not some college girl he had randomly picked up. He wanted more, but this couldn't happen even if she hadn't stopped him.

Aria looked away in embarrassment and stumbled an apology. "You don't have anything to apologize for Aria, I shouldn't have done that. I got carried away because," what was he supposed to say, because that was usually the typed of girls he was with, or because he got carried away when she had showed him she cared about him and he was starved for affection, both were true and both made him sound completely pathetic., "well, I just forgot myself, I'm the one whose sorry."

Aria blushed, but smiled at him and told him that she had gotten carried away too. Jason stifled a groan. He had thought Aria had gotten over her crush a couple years earlier, but he could see in her eyes that she still had a crush on him, a complication he did not need. "I guess I should go." Aria sitting up, but Jason stopped her completely contradicting his thought that he did not need this complication. He should have just let her go, but he couldn’t.

He didn't want to be alone again, "Stay with me." he said in an almost pleading tone. "I promise I won't do anything like that again." how could he tell her he was afraid to be alone because every time he closed his eyes he seen that note and heard Alison begging him for help but he was too stoned to do anything just lay there as she was being dragged away; or that for the first time in a long time she made him feel like he wasn't completely worthless and unwanted.

"I have to be home by nine so I will stay as long as I can. Ever since ..."she stopped, Jason knew it was because of Alison, her friend’s parents were afraid of losing their own daughters, "umm, well lately my parents have wanted me home at night so I'm not allowed to spent the night with anywhere." Aria moved to lay back down beside him and held her arms open and Jason lay back down, his arms going around her his head moving to the crook of her shoulder. Jason closed his eyes and in a tired voice told her he would take her home when she was ready. Wrapped in her arms he falls asleep almost immediately.

Aria caressed the blonde head that had moved to her chest nuzzling his face into her breast, they weren't exactly big, but that didn't seem to bother the guy asleep in her arms as he sighed in contentment. Aria stayed until eight thirty and then she carefully crawled out of Jason's bed and found her flip flops. She leaned over and brushed a tender kiss on his forehead and whispered, "I love you Jason." She didn't have the heart to wake him so she flipped off his light and crept quietly down the steps, turned the knob so it would lock automatically and left the house silently.

Jason didn't wake up until the next morning and for the first time in a long time he didn't have a hangover and felt well rested. His mind went back to the night before and he reached for the girl who had been there for him when he needed someone, but the bed was empty. He sat up quickly and looked around, he ran downstairs, but she was gone.

He freaked out, for the first-time Jason realized he had fallen for Aria and it couldn't be more inappropriate. She was one Alison's best friend. He had let Alison down when she needed him, he didn't even know if he had something to do with her disappearance and she hated him, she had lived to humiliate and blackmail him and this would have been more ammunition to use against him if she were still here. It was bad enough that Aria was one of Alison's best friends, but she was fifteen and he was twenty.

That day Jason loaded up what he could in his car and hadn't looked back not even coming home for Alison's funeral. He signed himself into rehab and finished college. After that he went to work for Carissimi’ a family owned company with their charity side. He worked with so many people who were victims of famine, drought, catastrophes and war, people who had faced problems so much bigger then he could dream of that it put life in perspective and helped keep him clean as he had been ever since that night Aria showed up at his parents’ house offering him compassion and even though he ran from it her love.

That was his first night of sobriety, he had never even thanked her. Like a coward, he had run afraid to face the feelings that had probably been developing since he first met her when she was eleven, not long before his sixteenth birthday. He hadn't been ready for this realization. He had never even had a serious girlfriend and the thought that he was could be falling for Aria scared the hell out him. He wasn't ready for any commitments, he still had things he wanted to do before he ever thought of settling down with one girl, especially when the girl wasn't even old enough to drive.

Present  
He had been overseas when his mother, Jessica contacted him with the news, "Jason, she's home. Our girl is alive, she is home." he didn't get to ask many questions or talk to Alison since it was a poor connection. It had taken him three days to get home, but he had talked to his mother when he landed earlier and found out that it had been her friends who brought her home. Jason pulled up in the driveway and Alison rushed out the door, she had been waiting for him and threw her arms around his neck. "Oh, my god, Jason!” she said tears filling her eyes, “I never thought I would get to see you again. I have so many things I have to tell you, there are so many things you have to know."

Alison and Jason stayed up for most of the night talking and when he got up the next morning it was to find the girls at his house just like old times. His eyes went to Aria and he felt his heart pounding, but she turned her head away. Feelings of disappointment, sorrow and guilt welled up deep inside. He had to talk to her and explain why he had left. It wasn't until later that afternoon he had a chance to catch her alone.

"Aria?"

"Oh, hey Jason." She said looking down at her feet.

"I need to talk to you." He pleaded

"Really?" She said looking at him, her eyes guarded.

Jason ran his hands through his hair that he had gotten cut the morning after he landed, the shorter length still odd to him. He had wanted to look decent when he seen Her. He needed to be cool and take it slow, it had been almost over 2 years since he had run away and he needed to give her time, they needed to get to know each other again.

"Aria, I care about you I always have, more than I should have actually, but the timing was wrong. I've tried to forget you, but I can’t. I have to know it there is a chance you care about me?" she looked at him with a stunned expression. He hadn’t meant to say that yet, but it was too late and he just acted on his feelings. He cupped her jaw and moved toward her angling her mouth to his and kissed her slowly not unlike the first time they kissed and she responded just as naturally as she had that night, her hands moving to his shoulders clutching the tightly. He moaned, for the first time in so long he felt complete, he deepened the kiss only for her to push him away.

"I can't do this." She said shaking her head trying to clear the fog, he couldn't just come back into her life after more than two years and expect to pick up where they left off as if nothing had happened. "We can't do this"

"Why not?" He knew he had a lot to explain, but this felt right and he knew she felt it too.

"I can't do this because I am unavailable, I have a boyfriend that loves me, one who almost died trying to help us get Alison back. We can't do this because you left. You didn't even tell me goodbye, I went to your house the next day to check on you. I asked to talk to you when your mom answered the door and she looked at me with pity and told me you went back to college. I felt so stupid, I thought that night meant something and you just took off and I never heard from you again. You can't just show up and think that we can be together now that it is convenient for you." she walked away from him and Jason stood there fighting back tears.

After everything that had happened with Alison and the secrets their parents realized she knew they came clean with him, Melissa and Spencer and told them that Peter was his father. Melissa hadn't taken the news well, but it hadn't been easy for him either. Finding out he had made out with his half-sister a few times wasn't exactly a highlight in his life. Spencer wanted to get to know her brother and have a relationship even if Peter was discouraging it.

A few weeks later Jason was at the mall with Alison and Spencer helping them pick out formals for the winter dance at school. It wasn't his idea of fun, but it made them happy. He was waiting for them when he seen Aria with man with dark hair and wearing a sweater vest. Spencer came out of the dressing room and seen who Jason was looking at.

"That is Ezra, Aria's boyfriend. He helped us get Alison back." Spencer told him, " They have gone through so much they are meant to be together." Spencer went in to try on another dress not realizing that her words had broken Jason with a feeling of defeat he turned his attention back to the couple. Aria was looking straight at him with a look of longing and desire that matched his own. And he knew Aria was in love with him, he wasn't sure why she was with Ezra Fitz, but Jason DiLaurentis came to a decision. He was fighting for Aria and when he got her, he was never letting her go again.

Fin

**Author's Note:**

> This started out as a one-shot, but someone suggested I consider a sequel, this is the first story in a series of one shot’s I am tentatively calling Jason’s Realization if done right all will be done with Jason’s being the main POV and all will be connected, this could be a series of five or fifty-one-shots, depending on how each play out as inspiration hits, I am not a planner almost anything I write is flow of consciousness so the only thing planned is that Jaria eventually get together.
> 
>  
> 
> Kisses  
> GrimLi


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